faith

I acknowledge I've lived most of my adult life out of fear. Fear of not knowing what will happen in my life. Worry and anxiety are just two things I have dealt with pretty regularly. This past January I felt my life shift a little and made the decision to make more of an effort to live my life out faithfully and trust more in the plans God has for me. I feel like this next week I will really be able to gauge just how well I'm succeeding.

Lucy had her 18 month check up this last week. Several months ago the doctor noticed a bump on her right shin and asked me about it. After several minutes of examination, he decided it wasn't anything to be worried about. About a month after that appointment the bump was still there, but since it wasn't any bigger, Scott and I decided not to worry about it and only take her back in unless it grew.

Which brings me to her appointment a couple days ago. I asked the doctor what the bump could be, as it was still there. He examined her again and decided to order an x ray. The x ray showed two spots of some kind of growth on her right tibia. A spot on her shin and another down by her ankle. Our doctor consulted with a pediatric radiologist, and while the radiologist feels confident the spots on Lucy's leg are benign she wants to get an MRI to gather more information about what could be growing in/around/on her bone.

Our MRI is scheduled for Thursday morning. Lucy will probably have to be sedated for the test. To what extent I'm still unsure. I have definitely been known to jump to worst case scenario in any situation. I'm not letting myself do that here. I'm not going to lie though, I've had my break down moments. Every time I hear the song Hillsong United sings called "Take Heart," I weep. I don't know what the tests are going to show. I don't know how much we're going to be responsible for financially and feel stress from that. Despite my stress, I'm finding comfort and peace in several Bible verses that I felt lead to memorize over the last few months.

John 16:33 - I tell you these things that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulation, but take heart, I have overcome this world.

Colossians 1:17 - He is before all things and in him all things hold together.

Ephesians 4:6-7 - Do not be anxious about anything, but with prayer and petition with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace that transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I know some family and friends have already started praying for us. I don't think I could feel as calm or peaceful without those prayers. If you do pray, would you mind lifting Lucy up this week? Especially Thursday. We already appreciate it!