results...kind of

First off, I just want to tell everyone how blessed I feel by the overwhelming responses and support we feel from our friends and family while we navigate through stuff going on in our lives right now. It was pretty incredible getting notification after notification and text after text yesterday of so many people putting us in their thoughts and prayers.

Lucy's MRI went well...once the sedation was on board. Her first IV went bad after 30 minutes or so, but no one knew until we were in the MRI scanning room - ready to give her the medicine. So out we went and about 30 minutes later, there was a new IV in place. By this time she was exhausted (she'd been up since 5:30 with no nap or food) so she was definitely ready for some shut eye. The test lasted about 50 minutes and then we promptly left the hospital.

This is Lucy and I right after her first IV and before the MRI. See what I mean...exhausted!

The Dr's office called this morning with the MRI results...kind of. One thing is for sure. The growths are NOT cancer and will NOT turn into cancer. Praise the Lord! However, because the MRI didn't show much that the physicians didn't already know, Lucy is being referred to an Orthopedic pediatric specialist for further evaluation. I still have to call for an appointment but I'm hoping to been seen sometime within the next two weeks.

Never in my life have I had to rely so much on my faith and trust in God to provide the peace to get me through the anxiety I felt. I am so grateful that whatever going on is not more serious. Yes, I'm still concerned, but no longer fearful of the outcome - no matter what is going on. I know that in tough situations I am able to get through because I'm relying on God get me through, not on myself.

Thanks again for thinking of us!

faith

I acknowledge I've lived most of my adult life out of fear. Fear of not knowing what will happen in my life. Worry and anxiety are just two things I have dealt with pretty regularly. This past January I felt my life shift a little and made the decision to make more of an effort to live my life out faithfully and trust more in the plans God has for me. I feel like this next week I will really be able to gauge just how well I'm succeeding.

Lucy had her 18 month check up this last week. Several months ago the doctor noticed a bump on her right shin and asked me about it. After several minutes of examination, he decided it wasn't anything to be worried about. About a month after that appointment the bump was still there, but since it wasn't any bigger, Scott and I decided not to worry about it and only take her back in unless it grew.

Which brings me to her appointment a couple days ago. I asked the doctor what the bump could be, as it was still there. He examined her again and decided to order an x ray. The x ray showed two spots of some kind of growth on her right tibia. A spot on her shin and another down by her ankle. Our doctor consulted with a pediatric radiologist, and while the radiologist feels confident the spots on Lucy's leg are benign she wants to get an MRI to gather more information about what could be growing in/around/on her bone.

Our MRI is scheduled for Thursday morning. Lucy will probably have to be sedated for the test. To what extent I'm still unsure. I have definitely been known to jump to worst case scenario in any situation. I'm not letting myself do that here. I'm not going to lie though, I've had my break down moments. Every time I hear the song Hillsong United sings called "Take Heart," I weep. I don't know what the tests are going to show. I don't know how much we're going to be responsible for financially and feel stress from that. Despite my stress, I'm finding comfort and peace in several Bible verses that I felt lead to memorize over the last few months.

John 16:33 - I tell you these things that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulation, but take heart, I have overcome this world.

Colossians 1:17 - He is before all things and in him all things hold together.

Ephesians 4:6-7 - Do not be anxious about anything, but with prayer and petition with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace that transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I know some family and friends have already started praying for us. I don't think I could feel as calm or peaceful without those prayers. If you do pray, would you mind lifting Lucy up this week? Especially Thursday. We already appreciate it!

oatmeal cream pies

I'm thinking maybe, just maybe, I'm started to feel rested up from the last two weeks.

I am so excited that I am starting a week off from work today and my youngest sister, Allyson, is coming to visit AND Scott gets a break from school. I'm eager to get the housework done and weeds pulled so I can just relax for the next few days.

I've started the day with some housework and the girls and I ate Oatmeal Cream Pies for a snack. I feel both responsible and irresponsible :)

motivation

I have felt absolutely no motivation over the last week or so. I just want to do nothing. It's not that I'm tired or anything...just don't want to do anything. Life has been totally crazy the last two weeks. Between working overtime, stress at work, stress at home because I'm working more than usual, not being able to run (because of schedules), Scott working and being out of town for a few days, and learning even more about myself and how God wants me to treat others...whew.

I'm hoping to change the lack of motivation today.

conversation

Here is a conversation that took place between Scott and Lucy right before Scott left for work this morning:

Scott: I'm going to go to work now ok, Lu? I want you to be good today, ok?

Lucy: Okwaaay

Scott: Are you going to be a good listener for mom today?

Lucy: Uh huh

Scott: Are you going to play nice with Elly?

Lucy: No, no, No.

occupied

I think I pack my days so full (mentally, physically, spiritually) that sometimes I forget to pay attention when I really need to.

I was occupied with some of my 'business' the other day when Lucy walked up to me. She kept saying "ooge, ooge." I was kind of waving for her to go sit for a minute and I would help her as soon as I was done. I probably said that to her at some point, but she was very persistent. After hearing "ooge, ooge" about 25 times I finally looked over and said, "Lucy! What is wrong?!"

Her finger appeared very close to my face with a booger, bigger than the tip of her pinky on it.

Looking back at my track record the last week, my mom job can be really gross.